Last Thoughts

                After reading some of the comments, I was reminded of some things that I was not able to cover in the other entries. The two most important things that I thought of was choosing the cake/groom’s cake and deciding if you want a wedding planner. You need to make both of these decisions as a couple. The cake is a piece of your wedding that you share with all of your guests and you want to have a delicious and beautiful cake to share with them. The wedding planner can help you through the entire process and make your life a little easier if you want to pay the extra money to have their help.

                I actually had an interesting experience with trying to go in and set up an appointment with the cake people. I called the bakery to try to set-up an appointment for a taste test but as I talked to the receptionist, she was not very polite. As she was telling me that I was too early and that I needed to call back in six months, all I could think was that I was stuck with this company. The venue we booked for our reception has a deal with this bakery and we are required to use the bakery since we booked the venue. I do not really appreciate when people I hire to do something talk back with attitude like the woman from the bakery, so I was none too pleased. However, I had to remind myself that nine months out from the wedding was a little soon to be working on the cake so that is something we will do soon. Shop around at different bakeries and schedule multiple taste tests, if you can, to make sure you get a delicious and beautiful cake.

The Groom’s Cake is a tradition that involves the bride buying a cake for the groom, and having it decorated as something that the groom loves. For example, I have seen groom’s cakes decorated like logos from universities, fishing gear, and even beer cans. Mine will be in the shape of an armadillo and made of red velvet cake.

                The wedding planner is an option you could opt for if you want to avoid any part of or all of the hassle of planning the wedding. The planner is there to handle all of the little details that can drive you crazy and to make your life easier. We did not hire one but I would follow the same advice that I gave about anyone else you hire. Meet with them multiple times, make sure your personalities mesh, and do not be afraid to tell them what you want, especially if they have many suggestions. You can end up losing the wedding you want if you let someone decide things for you.

                Overall, it has been a great experience sharing our stories with you and I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Thanks for reading.

The Honeymoon

                We are finally at the end of the whole planning process and we now get to decide on where we want to go for the honeymoon. As the getaway destination after the ceremony, you need to take care of the honeymoon plans well before the wedding takes place. Everyone’s honeymoon is different and just because you do not go to Tahiti does not mean that yours is any worse than someone who does.

                Since I start working as a tax accountant this August, I will be right in the middle of busy season for accountants when my wedding comes around. During March and April, accountants typically work between 50-80 hours a week depending on how much work needs to be completed. Our wedding on February 29 will be right in the middle of that time. Due to that fact, we have decided to take a short honeymoon during early March and a longer vacation in May. It is kind of a let-down that we will not get to enjoy a long honeymoon, but duty calls and we plan to take a great summer vacation.

You need to think about situations like this while you plan your own honeymoon so that you do not end up making plans and then rescheduling them. Also, think realistically about what you can afford. We would love to go to Italy and visit all of the famous cities but it just is not practical on our budget and timeline now. As a side note, since our anniversary only happens every four years, we plan to go to Italy on our first real anniversary four years from now. I urge you to look realistically at what you can afford and decide based on what both of you need and want to get out of the honeymoon. The honeymoon is the time for you as a couple to celebrate your new life together and you do not need to go somewhere exotic to do that.

However, whether you get to go somewhere exotic or not, dream big. Do not be afraid to ask for discounts based on your length of stay or membership in some organizations like AAA. Some people might be willing to give you a discount simply because you are newlyweds! Also, think outside the box when you pick your destination, you do not need to follow everyone else. If your ceremony occurs during the fall, you could go to a little lodge in the mountains and enjoy the leaves changing colors while you take walks together or sit by a roaring fire. It is worth really thinking about because after all, the honeymoon celebrates the fact that you just left your wedding and now you are done!

               

The Ceremony

                Each couple can get exactly what they want out of their wedding ceremony. Many officiates are flexible about how the ceremony is run and who is involved. Each person will have their own ideas for the ceremony but the bride and groom need to support each other and fight to get what they want at their own ceremony. The first step in the ceremony is picking someone to officiate.

               

Unfortunately, I do not have much experience in picking someone to officiate your wedding. My fiancée and I are members of the same church back home in Houston so it was an easy choice for us. We have the pastor at our church doing our ceremony and we did not even look at anyone else. However, the rest of my advice is dependent on if you want a wedding performed by a religious leader, a Justice of the Peace, or someone else you find that is legally allowed to perform the ceremony. However, I can offer a little advice based on other experiences I have had in searching for other people involved in the wedding.

First, meet with the person you want to marry you more than once before the ceremony. We are going to “Pre-Marital Counseling” with our pastor, which really is not as bad as it sounds. It is mostly a way for the pastor to get to know us as a couple and as individuals on a more personal basis. If you decide to go with someone that you have not met or know well, I would recommend you set up a few sessions to get to know each other (all three of you). If the person performing the ceremony knows you, they are able to deliver a more personal message instead of using a generic reading of the vows.

Also, during your sessions make sure that the person you chose is open to change and is willing to do what you want. There are some people out there that do things the way they want and it does not matter what the bride and groom want because they know what is right. Conduct a little research before you bring this up so you have some idea of whether you want your ceremony to be more traditional or more contemporary. We decided to have a couple different things happen during our ceremony and our pastor was encouraging of our taking ownership of what we want. We are having someone do a reading before the vows start and we are taking the Lord’s Supper (Communion) with our Best Man and Maid of Honor. We are very traditional people and it made sense for us to do the ceremony in a traditional way but we also are doing those couple of things to change it up. It is your ceremony so you need to do things that make you happy and remember it as a great start to your marriage.